Did you miss me?

Did you miss me?

It’s been nearly 18 months since I wrote my last blog post, Take Care of You. I wish I could say I’ve been very busy following my own advice from that post.

Instead, I think I was doing the opposite. I was immersing myself in taking care of everyone but me. You could probably call me a professional volunteer. My house was a disaster, my mother’s health was getting worse and life was getting more chaotic and less blissful all the time. For much of that time, and for the first time ever in my life, I was unhappy.

My mother’s health hit a bump in the road last October. It’s a long story, and one I will probably tell sooner than later. The relevant point here is that she’s been living with us since December 1. We’re all still adjusting. The adjustments probably warrant a blog post at some point, too.

In the midst of all of this adjusting, I took on the biggest challenge of my life: raising $80,000 to retain a school safety officer in our school district. A cause I greatly believe in, but one that has consumed much more of me than I ever thought possible!

Stress. Stress. Stress.

Even doing things you enjoy and are passionate about (rather than work you have to do) cause stress when there are so many things going on at once.

I was also wrestling with the idea of what life was going to look like when school started this year. My oldest started high school. My second child started junior high. The third started 4th grade. And, my baby started kindergarten. All day kindergarten.

Sniff. Sniff. Sniff.

And OUCH!

Nothing like three of four kids embarking on educational milestones to slap me in the forehead and scream, “YOUR KIDS ARE GROWING UP FAST!”

My baby. The one I quit work and got to stay home with was leaving for kindergarten.

Did I make the most of the time we had? There are crafts to make, books to read and cupcakes to bake that we never got to!

Oh no! I’m going to be home all day, alone, with my often cranky, always forgetful, rarely conversational mom.

Summer. Summer. Summer.

We had a wonderful time as a family this summer! Thanks in large part to my husband and his crazy (and sometimes annoying) spontaneity. Lots of little day trips, one long weekend. Tons of fun and memories!

School.  School.  School.

School has been in session for two weeks now. I have 35 hours a week with no one here but my mom and the pets.

There is peace. There is quiet.

And in that peace and quiet, I’ve found some things—

–a much cleaner house

–the buzzer on my dryer when the cycle ends (I don’t think I’ve ever heard it before)

–the tranquility and giddiness that comes simply from an uninterrupted shower

–and me.

Yes, in the peace and quiet, I’m finding me.

My old self.  The self that is a better wife, mother, daughter, house keeper, friend and even volunteer.

I know, you probably didn’t miss me over the last 18 months.

But I did.

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