If you’re a friend of mine, or a family member or even a regular reader of this blog, then you know the shlumping economy hit our household on August 20, 2008. The last time I wrote about our experience was on the first anniversary of that hit.

It was a pretty positive post. We were doing pretty well. Then in the blink of an eye, we weren’t so OK anymore.

The months of September, October, November and December sent us one blow after another.

BAM! Michael’s biggest client decided they no longer needed his services.

BAM! The Department of Human Services decided we weren’t eligible for benefits anymore.

BAM! The COBRA subsidy ran out.

BAM! The Department of Job and Family Services decided Michael wasn’t eligible for unemployment anymore.

I felt absolutely defeated. I was frustrated. The savings we’d built up over several months was gone seemingly overnight. We were back to square one–or square zero.

I know I probably wasn’t much fun to be around. (Thank you my dear friends for sticking with me.) We were in almost exactly the same situation we’d been in a year before but my attitude was much different. I still had faith, still trusted in God’s plan, but really felt I was reaching the end of what I could handle.

I remember crying myself to sleep on New Year’s Eve. A night when most are feeling hopeful about what the new year will bring, I was almost hopeless.

So here we were in January, again. Amazingly, the interviews started happening again. Little by little all the bureaucratic red-tape got straightened around and we started receiving help again from Human Services and Unemployment. The COBRA subsidy was extended.

There was hope, but less of it. I guess one gets jaded after being knocked down from the pedestal of hope time and again.

Amidst the job interviews, one opportunity was most intriguing. But also most risky as the company is a start-up. We began having the same conversation we’d had the previous January during the slew of interviews while we weighed the option of Michael having his own business.

How will we know which is the right decision? If there’s an offer from a stable company that’s been around awhile, do we take that and then have regrets later if this start-up really takes off? What if we go with the start-up and they fail in 6 months or a year? Then we go through all this again.

We prayed for guidance.

You know, I think maybe God doesn’t trust our decision making ability because he seems to make the answers abundantly clear. None of the other interviews panned out. Nothing to lose. Take the risk.

Michael’s been on contract with them for the last two months and we’ve been holding our breath. As of today, he is EMPLOYED! (insert Hallelujah chorus here)

Is this God’s plan? No clue!

But, we’re hopeful again. Making plans again. And if it turns out this IS God’s plan, we’re thankful for the past 19 months, 11 days which brought us to this opportunity willing to take a risk.

and…EXHALE!

Not surprisingly, I’m also overweight. Not ridiculously, pathetically or embarrassingly overweight, but definitely overweight.

I don’t enjoy exercise, I don’t enjoy sports. Never have, never will.

I’ve made attempts over the years to get in shape and to lose weight. Can’t say I’ve ever gotten in shape, but I have lost weight. Trouble is, every time I lost it, I got pregnant again. Other than the pregnancies, I think the main thing holding me back was lack of motivation. I need a buddy to encourage me to get to the gym, someone to cheer me on–and someone for me to cheer on–to victory. I’ve never really had that before.

Now, I do. This is it. This time is different. This time will work.

The ‘baby’ is 2 1/2 years old. Time for the baby weight to go away.

It’s time to take control of my body, my mind, and my mouth. Time to shape up!

I took the first steps today, literally. Two of my friends and I hit the gym at the local YMCA. We put the kids in the childcare center and off we went. I spent 35 minutes on the treadmill.

Didn’t love it. But didn’t hate it either.

And so it begins–again. And for the last time.

We’re going back tomorrow. We can do this. Together. We. Can. Do. This.

What kinds of tricks do you play on your kids for April Fool’s Day?

my precious ones

]]> http://mychaoticbliss.com/2010/03/07/ok-so-im-a-day-late/feed/ 0 http://mychaoticbliss.com/2010/03/07/center-stage/ http://mychaoticbliss.com/2010/03/07/center-stage/#comments Mon, 08 Mar 2010 03:54:53 +0000 Amy http://mychaoticbliss.com/?p=988

Girl Scout Thinking Day

Demonstrating Saipha at BBA Trade Fair 2010

This week, I had the chance to see two of my darlings take center stage in their respective activities.

Leah and her Daisy Girl Scout Troop gave a presentation about Girl Scouts (or Guides as they are called) in Mexico. The event was in celebration of World Thinking Day: a day when Girl Scouts and Girl Guides around the world think about one another.

She looked adorable, knew her lines, spoke clearly into the microphone, and smiled. I was a proud mama!

My oldest darling, Zachary, was asked to participate in a Goju-Ryu Karate demonstration at the annual Bedford Business Association’s Trade Fair. The program is part of Bedford Public School’s Community Education Program.

He was asked to demonstrate the kata Saipha. He and his partners did an excellent job! He also demonstrated kumite, or sparring. I don’t particularly enjoy watching that part…always afraid something will get broken.

In my defense, blog posts weren’t the only things that didn’t get done this week. I didn’t do laundry, clean house, cook, take my son for his allergy shots or even remember to have my 1st grader do her homework. I’m sure if you asked my husband, he would be able to add several items to the list of things I did not do this week.

A big part of my life is spent volunteering–Daisy Girl Scout Leader, PTO Treasurer, Robotics Coach, Mom 2 Mom Sale Organizer, Classroom Volunteer, etc. I find volunteering to be very rewarding. I enjoy giving of my time to help others. But this particular week, it seemed that all of the facets of my life collided and demanded my time. Add to that the usual stuff that happens when you’re a family of six and you can see how life could spin out of control once in awhile.

Again, I’m sure if you asked my husband, he’d be able to detail how the volunteering causes life to spin out of control more often than once in awhile. But he has his own blog and if wants to complain about me, he can do it there.

Speaking of spinning…it appears that it’s possible that the devastating Chilean earthquake last week may have actually altered the rotation of the earth and shortened our days–by 1.26 microseconds.

C’mon, Mother Nature, I needed that microsecond!

Leah gave this to me when she was 5. It's my "get un-grumpy" picture.

Today, I am very simply thankful for the sunshine.

It shone so brightly in my windows today that it blinded me this morning as I was trying to fix lunches and fill backpacks in front of my east-facing windows.

This afternoon, it shone so brightly in a west-facing window that it reflected off the pages of the book I was reading to Sarah and hurt our eyes.

This evening, at sunset, it shone so brightly in my eyes as I was trying to park the van, that I could barely see to do it.

And all day long it was melting the snow!

Spring is in the air, the birds are chirping in the morning and I have my eyes peeled to spot my first robin of the season.

Oh Mr. Sun, Sun, Mr. Golden Sun…Please shine down on me!

I thought I had someone I could rely on. Someone who could care for them as well, if not better, than I. I’ve trusted this person with my children for more than 11 years. Eleven years. Without incident.

Recently, though, I’ve begun to wonder if this individual is really the type of caregiver I want for my children. While I don’t have a nanny cam, I do have some photographic and video footage to present to you as evidence.

Take a look and then tell me: Would you leave your children with this person?

Exhibit A

Exhibit B

Exhibit C

Exhibit D

Exhibit E

Exhibit F (He's a french hobo?!)

And finally, Exhibit G.

Now, tell me, should I leave them with their Daddy anymore?

On the up side:

1. My work-at-home husband was gone most of the day so I had the house to myself (well my daughter and the dog were here, but you get the idea).
2. I was super productive while he was gone. Many items were cleared from my to-do list and therefore my brain. Most of these things were simple, but time consuming things I’d been putting off for quite awhile.
3. I enjoyed laughs, hugs and kisses from all of my kids.
4. I also had time to chat with a few girlfriends today.
5. All the kids went to bed on time and stayed there–the first time.
6. Oh, yeah, and I remembered to feed all of the kids.

On the down side:

1. My son had to have a barely loose baby tooth pulled so orthodontic work can proceed.
2. Too much of my time was wasted on the drama being created by a couple parents at my kids’ school.
3. None of that super productive stuff I got done was housework.

Yep, B+.

Ah, tomorrow will be better, though. I’m predicting an A-.  I’m getting my hair cut and colored (long overdue), selling Girl Scout Cookies at the local pizza joint with my daughter, but will likely have to deal with more drama from aforementioned parents.

More pluses than minuses. That’s a good day!